Samantha!

Since I'm pretty awesome at giving 2nd, 3rd, and 15th chances... a second chance (if none else) is sufficient. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes.

Pretty eyes is probably the cutest thing ever. If I could only sew his mouth shut, we’d might be a match. He’s just one of those that says a lot of stupid or corny things. I dunno if it’s cus he’s nervous around me or if he’s just a genuine idiot. But overall he’s a sweet guy. And he lets me pay for my own meal so he might even be kinda smart too.

As for the other fellow, we’ll call him Mr. Indecisive, he can’t make up his mind if he wants to stay with this chick that is apparently a total controlling bitch that he constantly fights with and is [supposedly] physically abusive towards him. I’m losing my patience here. And I’m starting to think I’m only around for my resourcefulness. That may or may not be true, but it’s such a shame that I’m wasting so much time and feelings on someone who I’m 99% compatible with. What’s even worse is that his parents are on my side completely. They think I’m a golden gift from the gods and he is a complete dumbass for being so naïve. Call me vain, but I agree.

School starts back Tuesdayyy! It’s my last semester then I finally get to go to a real college. Yes!

Wow. I met a guy.

One that’s just about as strange as I am. I haven’t gotten to spend a whole lot of time with him, but so far he’s nothing less than awesome. Creepy.

I think we have everything in common. Taste in movies, music, same unhealthy addictions, own the same vehicle, clothing style, sense of humor, pet peeves, etc, etc. and physically he’s about as fucked up as I am. He’s not in a wheelchair or anything but he had a surgery go wrong on his arm when he was younger. So in a way we can relate to each other when it comes to being different. Awww.

He’s out of town right now and it’s driving me nutsss. There’s just one complication (that I can’t discuss here) but which should hopefully be straightened out by the time he gets back. For now I'm just waiting... and waiting...



Other than that, SCHOOL’S OUT! And I finished with a 4.0 this semester, again. Next semester is my last before graduation, and supposedly will be the most strenuous since I have my internship and all. But I’m a tough cookie so I think it should work out fine. I will be in New Orleans again for New Years! I got my fingers crossed that ‘ole boy will come with me. You know, for that countdown kiss and all ;-).

Hope everyone has some Happy Holidays!!!

...Beer.
The first sip is always bitter.
No matter how many varieties you try, they are essentially the same; tasteless, full of bubbles, destabilize your metabolism and give you a headache, but somehow they linger and you either can't finish one or you can't get enough.


And what’s worse.. I’ve been sick with this pneumonia crap and I feel like my head just got run over by a lawnmower. I’m talkin one of those big commercial bastards. I haven’t had hardly any sleep since Thursday. I’ve got oodles of school work to catch up. I’m dying for a cigarette but I can barely stand to breathe regular air as it is. Cough drops are starting to taste like plastic. My dad’s bright idea of the peppermint schnapps was probably the worst thing ever. And when all this is over I’m going to need a lung transplant.

But other than that, things are just fine-less and shitty. I dunno what my problem is, but there isn’t a single guy in this solar system that I’m compatible with. No girls either. Pretty Eyes came over to Kim's to see me the other night, and of course, I was completely trashed. Not to mention smoking pot. Maybe it was the intoxication or I was just being a complete dumbass. Either way, I scared him off. Maybe I do need to change, sober up and go to a church so I can be [officially] eligible to talk shit about people like me. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Apparently that’s the only way to get out of the family spotlight. Ugh I hate the world today! I’m moving to a different universe. Peace

I've been single for a week! It’s so odd, when I check out other guys I still feel a little dirty. Jason is being such a good sport, though. Finally. I was half expecting to wake up one morning missing a leg or an eyeball (he’s been hanging around me too long). Yes, he was that pissed.

But there is some cute guy I see on campus every day. Don’t know his name so I just call him pretty eyes. And hear me, this boy’s got the most gorgeous peepers. Kinda got that Cillian Murphy thing going on. The lips too. And he always wears this green beanie that his hair kinda just curls out of... different. Anyway, I’m trying to holler at this kid. Maybe I can get a date this weekend ;].

I have a speech to give tomorrow on why the government should increase funding for stem cell research. I haven’t even STARTED on my note cards or even practicing. Eck. But big thanks to Obama for lifting the ban, however! Now I don’t have to worry so much about actual persuasion.

And HAPPY VETERANS DAYYY! I went to the mall today and all I saw was camouflage everywheree. Actually it wasn’t just the mall, but restaurants and bars too, since we share a city with the largest Army base in the country. They all deserve a day off I guess.

I guess that’s all I have to say. I’m waiting for Kim to call so we can [hopefully] all hang out tonight. What’s up with all the people in Wal-Mart that dress better than I do and have an EBT card? If you get the chance, go to Steak Escape and try out those loaded cheese fries.

We all make mistakes. Some more than others (I qualify for this category). Some pay for them and some never have to! Luckily St. Karma never forgets my face.

My last birthday Aaron and I get shit-tarded beyond all consciousness and screw. And I never told Jason (of course not! I mean, who seriously calls up their boyfriend the next day and says “oops, I cheated on you last night”). But as usual, he found out. We broke up Monday night, and he wants absolutely nothing to do with me. I can’t blame him! But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck.

Actually, I was getting pretty miserable in our relationship. We’re wayyy too different. I’m loud and obnoxious and always find someone to talk to. He’s always so quiet and just keeps to himself when I’m all over the place. He’s extremely arrogant and loves to challenge me and I fucking hate that. He has no optimism whatsoever. I could go on and on but the bottom line is we’re just not compatible. I see him more like a brother I think. But I didn’t want it to turn out like this, I value his friendship too much. He says he can’t be just friends with me. My ultimatum was all or nothing at all.



Other than that, anybody ever read “The Secret”? I would recommend it. Or even if you don’t like to read there’s a DVD documentary about it. It’s some pretty interesting stuff so you should check it.

--“Whether you think you can or think you can’t, either way you are right”

The heat from the coil in the light bulb and the below freezing temperature of the freezer could cause the bulb to shatter.

Insanity. That’s the only way I can describe it. Of course, New Orleans is insane 365. But I guess since I haven’t been (or at least haven’t been to party) in almost 3 years could have a lot to do with my overwhelmedness.

But I have to start on Thursday night. Me and Kimi decide we’re way past due for a much needed night out together, so we go to Ropers (where else?). We left about closing time, uber trashed, and got pulled over because Kim’s tag light was out. Well, hell yeah it was obvious we’d been drinking. Kim gets arrested and Jason has to come pick me up. He gets her from the police station and at close to 4am we finally get about 4 hours of sleep before we got to go get her car from the impound. A DUI really sucks, but sometimes we have to learn the hard way. I feel bad because I got off easy but yet was still very much involved. But at least now it’s something to laugh at, kinda. Sorry Kim, haha.

So I rushed home and rushed to get ready to go to New Orleans. We finally pick up Hope and Tara and are on our way after 5pm. Due to ridiculous traffic, careless pedestrians, Aaron getting lost, hotel room complications, and getting everyone’s costume right, we didn’t hit the street until 1am.
So because Bourbon St isn’t equipped with any accessible bathrooms for me, I thought it’d be a brilliant idea if I drank nothing but shots all night so I wouldn’t have to pee as much (which by the way does not work). I’m trashed in some bar in no time, making out with a Reno 911 cop, talking some Mexican guys into buying all my shots, and hitting on the cocktail waitress. And later I tried to spank a police officer. A real one.
Back in the hotel room I go to pee in the bathroom and cant get my drunk ass back in my wheelchair. My phone was out of reach and everyone was in a dead sleep, so that’s where I slept. On the can.
Yesterday sucked worse than any hangover in human history ever. And I’m so ready to go do it again.

Only one thing sucked. Apparently Jason has some kind of compulsion to be constantly worried about me to the point of my aggravation. I really hate that. I’m a big girl, although a crippled one. But still if some hobo rapist tried to kidnap me I could still smash his face in.

i was 15. his name was dan johnson, and boy was he a cutie :D. i still smile thinking about it.

The hovering skateboards in Back to the Future 2 looked pretty fun.